" The Graduating Senior Gets Burgled"

Hey anyone out there. Never wrote nothing in a while except for the adjunct lab report now and then, so I thought of getting out some things that needed to be released.

Nothing much happened really much. Got a semester or so before graduating so I need to get my lazy ass out of the "gas money" job and into some kind of co-op or something. I'm sure padding my resume with my past experience as an illustrious theatre worker will get all those cool technical jobs lined up for me. I mean damn, I heard Boeing, Northrup Grumen, and Raytheon are looking for individuals who can not only "think outside the box" but also have an experience in sweeping up popcorn. Therefore, i do believe i got this job thing in the can.

... yup, the shit can.

Anyway enough of that.

Fuck the funniest thing happened the other day. I GOT FUCKING ROBBED. Damn fucking kids broke into our house and stole some shit. How do I know they're kids? Simple, they stole my fucking PS2. Oh well, now its time to fully concentrate on homewok i guess. They also rifled through my bros' drawer and stole his necklace and watch and shit, same thing for mom too.

Not only that, these must be the fucking dumbest criminals in the world because of the shit they stole or actually didn't. I find it very strange that they didn't steal any of the games, freking idiots. The dumbest thing that these assholes stole was a momento of my brother's infancy. See, he had a really tiny shirt that he wore as a tiny little 1 lb 11 ounce infant. These fucks had the fucking nerve to open up the case it was in and steal it. These idiots deserve to get fucked up royally.

This is funny because this incident really puts me into the vigilante kind of mood. I think its really fucking funny that i've now digressed back to that weapon buying phase in my life that I thought I grew out of from the 1st grade. Oh well too bad, I guess I'm gonna end up with a baton now (tactical, not the marching band kind) and maybe some other shit.

Either way I'm gonna feel sorry for these kids if they decide to come back for more stuff.

well maybe not that sorry.. fucking pricks

"I think I always remain the same..."

So every vacation season, friends always come back from where ever they fucking disappear to during the fall and spring months and to me they always look different.

I mean there are so many damn mysteries in life. Why do clocks run clockwise? If God really does exist, they why do so many bad things happen to good people? Which came first the chicken or the egg? Or speaking of chicken, if there are other parallel dimensions to this one, then do allot of things there taste like chicken? Or do the parallel dimension chickens taste like our chickens?

... well again I do digress.

But on that note there is always that mystery of change to oneself and how to really define change. I mean I know I have gotten a little bigger in some parts (damn pants!!) but can I or anyone else for that matter honestly say that they have changed over the years?

I dunno. Maybe change is only an occurance observed by an outside source. Maybe we never really change, but it just appears to have been so from other peoples' view. Possibly this is just me talking about me.

I know other people can say that they have changed, but have they really? Maybe a life changing event comes around and just hits you. Like hits you ferociously hard. Then you get knocked down on the ground by said event. Then the event comes out from the crowd really fast so that it can catch the moment when the event says, "HAHA BITCH!  IN YO FACE!!!" and then goes and runs away laughing before you can get your ass up to get the event back. And then the moment is gone. And for that you have changed.

I'd like to think that I still think the same. Sure I've got some fancy smancy number crunching, programming, physics and thermo, mechanical, electrical and dynamic shit in my head, but I still believe I process all these things the same way.

I have seen friends go through some pretty heavy things now and then. Maybe that's why they always look different. Is it really just an event that makes you do things differently or can it just come from inside you? Maybe a person in general gets bored of doing the same shit over and over again.

I guess its kind of like being in a relationship with someone. And there comes the point in every relationship when you have just about everything that she's got to say about everything. And then she's says something like, "hey, remember the time when we..." they you interject and say, "Yeah, I remember the time. We just said that like yesterday." And in the end you think to yourself, "I have heard all your shit already."

Maybe all that's just me, (but credit to Chris Rock for that bit) but I guess I need to go get some change. Not like under the couch or anything, but really try and find it.

hmmm..

Well I know I was always really shy when I was a kid. I remember really being quiet and shit. But look at me now. I always end up talking shit up like a muthafucka.

Wow well there's some change right there. I guess you find out something new everyday. Cool.

 

We'll that's probably it for me.

peace

"Crunch time" (and not a CAP'N in sight )

Well it looks like the only people up tonight are just me and the racers baby.

For the life of me I have no idea how my ultra organized parents raised such a fucking huge and overblown procrastinator like me. I mean I live by the phrase, "the last minute means you still have a whole 60 seconds, plenty time."

So here I am sitting in my living room at midnight just starting on my cribsheet for my dynamics final. Its looking pretty good, but I'd be happier if I had enough time to go over some more problems for practice. At least i have about 9 hours or so before the test actually starts. I think that's cool because I still have to go over my component design notes for the final after that dynamics one. Thank Allah I have 2 hours separating the two tests or I'd be in it so fucking deep ( I would've had a bloody reenactment of the past two semesters' finals. I remember now to never do that crazy shit again). Looks like some good old Stacker 2's gonna be my good friend for the next couple of days. (and that's the good stacker too. Not that pussy, "ephedra free" shit. I mean if it won't have the possibility of killing you, then how do you know if you'll get results or not? hehe)

I also am blessed that I have that nice and straight half-mile strip of roadway outside of my house. I mean if my body happens to overpower the chemicals I've got coarsing through my veins, then at least I've got them fucking engines to keep me awake once and a while. Its great too if you factor in the occasional Sole' "chaaahooo" every now and then from the ice freaks then I'm up for any amount of studying.

y'know the one thing I wish I didn't do the past week was pick up GTA III again. Fuck, I am so stupid and easily addicted to any kind of distraction. I mean look at me now, fucking writing my dam blog instead of fuckign equations for heavens sake. But hey at least I don't smoke anymore (which is weird given that I usually get addicted to stuff easily. oh well lucky me)

Well i guess i have to go before all these good things i got going in my system wear off and divine inspiration leaves me ( or before I find another good diversion).

 

Peace out homies (hehe I always wanted to say that. I'm such a fucking dummy that way)

"The good and the bad"

Hey look its been a while. The bad news is that I'm probably gonna start writing again..

 

...

...

So what's the good news?

Coco Puffs are on sale with 2 for the price of 1 at Foodland!!!

Hot dam I sure am thankful for that. Now instead of forraging for food and shit i could just eat some coco puffs any damn time.

Y'know i didn't really realize I was that lazy.... hehe... nah i actually did.

 

So I ran into old friends the other day as i was waiting in that hella long line for the sneak of hellboy.

Fuck y'know for someone who knew what it was like to work in the movies you'd think I'd have anticipated that long line. There I was thinking that the sneak preview would've been pretty small and shit. Oh well, shows what I can learn in a short 3 year stint.

Well anyway I ran into an old friend and I came into the same trap I fall into when I happen upon these circumstances.

I always get stumped at answering this question: "So what you up to now?" Or slight variations of the same such as, " Ho bra so whachu doing these days?" or, "So what happened to you, you fucka?" etc....

I mean obviously i've been doing stuff since I last saw you but man, I mean I just draw a blank when i get to it. I mean seriously I'm a live in the now kind of person so i tend to not think of past stuff that much.

So I think i'd like to end today with the things that I would like to say if someone asked me " So what you been up to these days?:"

1. Oh nothing much.

2. Shooting people.

3. Trying to get school done with.

4. Looking for work.

5. Scratching things (records, balls, back,... etc)

6. Crunching numbers(not to be confused with schoolwork)

7. buying stuff (or acting like i'm looking to buy stuff)

8. hanging out

9. Oh nothing much.

and

10. Repeating myself.

Thank you for allowing me to waste a minute or so of your time.  Peace out cuz.

" For those of you who live in brazil or speak portuguese out there...."

I thought i'd take up some space by puting down one of my posts in portuguese..

why?

because just for the fuck of it that's why!

hehe if you want to read the actual post it is the next one down on the same day... in english ... but for now portuguese

*please take note that the portuguese word for 'fuck' is fuck. so if you happen to swear in front of people who are offended by that you can just say, "Oh damn i'm sorry. Pardon my Portuguese."

 

 

"12 do outro lado; 7 letras; s_ _ _ _ _ d; indício: 'estão em problema fundo' "

Em verdade que eu quero barbear-me os 's' fora e diz que estou "fucked".

..

Mas adivinho terei que contentar-me com "parafusar". até hoje eu não sei por que eu antes estaria fazendo as palavras cruzadas de fucken que qualquer do outro trabalho que eu planejei hoje à noite... nem manhã eu adivinha no que diz respeito. Represado você Gina, Mel, e Cristal para receber que me começei nessas abominações de palavra de damned.

Represado você rapazes para fazer me wanna faz este que aprende sobre as características de materiais sob tensões, ou métodos numéricos, ou mesmo meu fucking equações parciais de diferencial no que diz respeito.

..<crickets chirping>

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?

Eu tal fucking dork para mesmo preocupando-se com shit como isso.

 

O hehehehe. realmente.

Seu sido um tempo realmente longo desde que coloquei algo então isto é somente meu meio pequeno de narração qualquer um ainda lá fora que eu ainda chuto e shit. tão não enterra-me ainda... isso é a menos que isso é seua coisa então enterra-me todo quer bebê! (Aww sim!!)

Bem que parte não fez nenhum sentido inteiramente.

 

Eu também compenso minha falta de material de escrito com espaços.

 

Olhe todos os espaços que eu ponho nesta cadela já.

 

 

Olálá olhe em.

 

 

 

 

 

Hehe nah. Acabo de esfriar desde que o semestre recomeçou. escolas estadas bem. e a coisa engraçada está eu ainda sou sem emprego como sempre parece. Represado afrouxa aquele trabalho de shit realmente fez me fucked para huh de trabalho?

Provavelmente não mas a boa coisa é que tenho todo este fucken livremente tempo nas minhas mãos.

A coisa maá sobre ele embora é que tenho fucking seco nos fundos ultimamente. TÃO REPRESADO SECO!

NECESSITO DINHEIRO! !$$$$$$$$$$

Sim sim sei que todo o mundo necessita dinheiro (exceto esses fucks feliz quem são alto em vida, represa-os) mas sou seriamente pobre aqui.

Quero dizer eu realmente ódio de fucking pegando o ônibus. (Mas pelo menos recebo as melhores sonecas para fora de ele)

E usei 200$ de meu cada que diminuindo poupança comprar me um TI-89 calculadora. (Advertindo isso era algum vocabulário de dorkish aí tão aí talvez algum mais para cima adiante).

Para homem de causa de fucks! Pude' acredita que eu tenho que baixar-me e me tenho que comprar um dessas calculadoras pesadas de graphing de dever. Quero dizer senti-me tão mau como fazendo todas as minhas provas com somente um wimpy calculadora solar que eu roubei de um de meus amigos ano sênior em highschool durante minha física final. Senti-me realmente orgulhoso de mim aquele meio. eu também senti-me realmente mau que gastei aproximadamente 186$ para meu TI. quero dizer estou feliz posso fazer todo que shits armazenado de fórmula e todo meu cálculo perguntas relacionadas podem todo ser exterior feito do meu cérebro, mas perdi a coisa que eu pensei diferençou-me do descanso.

(tá bom, sessão de dork sobre. costas a meu regularmente bitching de schedualed sobre dinheiro ou shit)

Bem onde estava? oh sim, eu necessito dinheiro. Sou então pobres de fucking que eu sou faminto todos os dias em causa de escola que eu pude' compram qualquer almoço, desjejum, ou shit regular de máquina automática de vendas. cada bebê pequeno de contagens de centavo!

O deus que eu odeio é então chang de fucking. Oh bem tempo de bater nas linhas de trabalho. Necessito-me algum pão rápido.

Boa noite todo o mundo e agradece para agüentar este shit.

 

o hehe eu disse shit novamente para completar

pouse paz

 

"12 across; 7 letters; s_ _ _ _ _ d; clue: 'you're in deep trouble' "

In truth i want to shave the 's' off and say that i'm 'fucked'.

...

But i guess i'll have to settle for being 'screwed'. to this day i don't know why i'd rather be doing the fucken crosswords than any of the other work i have planned this evening... or morning i guess for that matter. Damn you Gina, Mel, and Crystal for getting me started on those damned word abominations.

Damn you guys for making me wanna do this than learn about the characteristics of materials under stresses, or numerical methods, or even my fucking partial differential equations for that matter.

...<crickets chirping>

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?

I am such a fucking dork for even caring about shit like that.

 

hehehehe. really.

Y'know its been a really long time since i posted anything so this is just my little way of telling anyone still out there that i'm still kicking and shit. so don't bury me yet... that is unless that's your thing then bury me all you want baby! (aww yeah!!)

well that part made no sense entirely.

 

I'm also making up for my lack of writing stuff with spaces.

 

look at all the spaces i put into this bitch already.

 

 

wow look at em.

 

 

 

 

 

hehe nah. I've just been chilling since the semester started again. schools been alright. and the funny thing is i still am without employment as it always seems. Damn loosing that shit job really made me fucked for work huh?

Probably not but the good thing is that i have all this fucken free time on my hands.

The bad thing about it though is that i have been fucking dry on the funds lately. SO DAMN DRY!!

I NEED MONEY!!$$$$$$$$$$

yeah yeah i know everyone needs money (except those happy fucks who are high on life, dam them) but i am seriously poor here.

I mean I really fucking hate catching the bus. (But at least i get the best naps out of it)

and I used 200$ of my every dwindling savings to buy me a TI-89 calculator. (warning that was some dorkish vocabulary there so there maybe some more up ahead).

for fucks sake man! I cant' believe i had to stoop down and buy me one of those heavy duty graphing calculators. I mean i felt so bad ass doing all of my tests with just a wimpy solar calculator that i stole from one of my friends senior year in highschool during my physics final. I felt really proud of myself that way. i also felt really bad that i spent about 186$ for my TI. i mean i'm happy i can do all that stored formula shits and all my calculus related questions can all be done outside of my brain, but i lost the one thing that i thought differentiated me from the rest.

(okay, dork session over. back to my regularly schedualed bitching about money or shit)

well where was i? oh yeah, i need money. I'm so fucking poor that i'm starving every day at school cause i cant' buy either lunch, breakfast, or even vending machine shit. every little cent counts baby!

God I hate being so fucking chang. Oh well time to hit the job lines. I need me some bread quick.

good night everyone and thanks for puting up with this shit.

 

hehe i said shit again for good measure

alight peace

"10, 9, 8, 7, 6 .... What the fuck you mean its only 1130? .... Damn am I that drunk already?"

You have no idea how much will power and energy it took me to write
this title alone all drunk as fuck. Hey i'm surprised that my keyboard
isn't covered in puke right now.

hey alcohol, relatives, and gunpowder are a great holiday mix expecially when you live in Ewa Beach.

Cheeeeeeehoooooo. ok that's enough back to burning money i guess =,..,,m.

HAPPY NEW YEAR ANYONE!!

"Hey Everyone. Merry Belated Christmas and a futuritive Happy New Year.... and lol I have the holiday blues"

Hey so how am I feeling this vacation?

It's not really a feeling of depression this holiday season. It kind of
nags a bit at your soul. Or maybe that little feeling bit in your heart
that is fatally connected to your brain that kinda goes screwey and
stuff. Or it could be some little part of your finger that's cut and
you really need a bandaid for it but it kinda is at a joint so the
bandaid will eventually fall off because you really have that part of
your finger in motion all the time.

....
....

You know on second thought I'm gonna stick with the nagging at your soul answer.

Its really a feeling of disappointment in your whole self. Hey I know
that kind of sounds really egotistical or self-centered and such, but I
really think that this is the whold reason for the blues. It's kind of
like you letting yourself down all the time.

Kind of like when you really try to use your will power to not do
something and then.... BLAM!!!!!  ....... you're puking all over
yourself.

lol
It's really quite depressing like that. That is really distressing.

It feels like putting allot of effort to make your mom a birthday card only to lose it due to your own carelessness.

I mean how stupid is that?

lol

It's like planning for two weeks for an event then for the last minute
(literally) everything falls apart like some kind of dried shit through
your fingers.

That sort of thing.

This was really a distressing realization for me because hey, I'm normally a happy guy.

I thought nothing could really get me down. I mean really nothing.

NOTHING.

But I find that the only chink in my armor is one that I made myself.

Dam I suck at planning, I suck at will power, I suck at keeping track of shit.

I put myself down and that's just it.

well no happy smiles for me, but I still want to wish anyone who really
tries and attempts to read my entries A very Belated Merry Christmas
and Happy New Year.

Lord knows I'm not feeling it but i hope to God that no one else feels like this.

~jason

"FREE THE MACHINES DAMMIT!!!! AND DAM THE FUCKING MAN!!!!!"

Y'know what's funny? The other day I was judging a speech tournament at Mckinley and a fucking pepsi machine caught my eye. Actually a pair of them. They were both imprisoned in this insurmountable, impenetrable steel cage.

Needless to say my friend and I were taken aback. Agast if you will with the horror of how fucked up you have to be if you have to put a muthafuking strong box over your mutherfucking pepsi. Dammit.

So with this as fuel for the fire we took it upon ourselves to... well make asses out of ourselves as we spoke out for like a good half hour in horror and fury about how this is "THE MAN!!!" trying to put us down.

It was both amazing and hillarious at the same time. I was amazed about how much bullshit we could spew about how this puts down our civil liberties and freedoms. And how these machines represent how "the fucking man!!!" locks down us all in our so called "land of freedom". "Pffff... land of freedom. I'll see a land of freedom when my pepsi brothers here are free!!!" we spewed. Also hilarious at the same time because we were so entranced and were concentating so hard on what bullshit we could come up with next, we sort of forgot were were in a public place... and shouting. It was fucking hilarious and our old speech coach was just nearby. I'd like to think he was laughing too because it was a while since he heard us making asses out of ourselves. You know what sucks though is that no one from any of the speech teams joined us in our idiotic escapade. Dam back when I was a contestant you could get any of these crazy speech and debate people to rally to your cause. So what everyones gotta act serious now? Dam kids just don't know how to make asses out of themselves anymore.

Mostly though I think it was a good chance to blow off some steam before finals. This i think was a very good thing. I think everyone should do stupid things like that before any stressful activities. i think i clears the soul and frees the mind.

... just like the pepsi should be freed.

Be free pepsi! Run, Run Free!!!!

"Happy Belated Thanksgiving and thank the lord for turntables"

So i'd like to wish everyone within shouting distance: HAPPy Thanksgiving.

...

and i don't give a shit if its 4 days late. hahahahah

i'm a fucking dumbass.. hehe but nevermind that.

So I had a great thanksgiving. The whole family went over to my cousins house and eveyone had a good time. My mom was spectacular that she didn't have to cook anything. My dad happy that all he had to do for a whole day was eat, drink, and play cards. And my brother was extatic over the fact that my cousins turntables came in only a day or so earlier.

And me....

Well my uncle cooks this freking badass shrimp that is just freking .... i dunno badass so i was happy for that.

oh yeah and getting all this shrimp and gravy and shit all over my cousins records he took so much time to dig through. nah i didn't do that but i kinda had the best of all comers. I didn't have to help prepare shit, I get to play dj and spin some weird shit, I got to play some cards and win a little extra cash from some very drunk and angry relatives, and the best part is the shrimp.

....

wow y'know if that's all it takes to make me all reflective and thankful and shit then i truly am a simple man.

oh well i just have to guess i am.

so i haven't updated in a while. what else is new. No one in their right mind updates everyfreaking day.

....

well not really no one. ok i mean just me dammit!

haha. i mean i dunno i really have a hard time finding the time to get to a computer and write senselessly anymore.

I miss those early days when i was so fresh with vigor and sparkling and shining with electrical energy that i woudl just write aimlessly about anything like it was disentary of the fingers.

I mean I really hate turning on the computer just to program shit now. Ahhhhh I hate doing programs! I dont' even give a shit if that's even simple stuff.

I hate making 40mb excell files only to find out what i was doing for the past 7 hours was a waste of time. I hate staring at diagrams and graphs with that entirely lost feeling and impending failure looming over my head.

I'm sick of piles of homework waiting to be done weeks ago. this is pissing me off.

but y'know what?

I guess someone has to know this shit.

Well i guess i'm just gonna have to keep on keeping on.

hehe well what do you know... perseverence. At least i'm thankful for that.

oh yeah and my family too.

peace